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Tag Archives: The Jac

Bah humbug, the Hans Gruber edition

10 Saturday Dec 2022

Posted by Dennis Pilon in Poprock Themepark

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Anti-Christmas songs, Christmas Aguilera, Classic Pat, Die Hard, Edward O'Connell, Four Eyes, Hans Gruber, Holiday music, Make Like Monkees, Mike Weatherford, The Happy Somethings, The Jac, The Non-Traditionals, The Photocopies

Welcome to what appears will be an annual post of music for people who hate the holidays. Last year’s edition of Bah Humbug stumbled upon a veritable treasure-trove of holiday-hating should-be hits. It was all a bit shocking but still delightful. I mean, personally, I’m a sucker for holiday tunes yet I can’t help but admire the dedication and intensity of the anti-holiday crowd. And the comedy. The antis have definitely got a healthy disregard for the more sickly sweet seasonal sentiments. To honour all this disdain, it only seems fitting to draw inspiration from that Christmas movie for people who hate Christmas movies, Die Hard. So get your Grinch on and open your ears for Bah humbug, the Hans Gruber edition.

We kick things off with some jangle, naturally, because surely if ever there was a holiday guitar sound it would have to be the Rickenbacker 12 string. Joe Algeri’s The JAC (and the Christmas Crew) project crank up the Byrds influences to launch their anti-materialist “I Don’t Want Your Presents” and even give a shout out to Canada. Honestly the song is not so much anti-holiday as anti-consumerist but given that it attacks a key element of the holy trinity of modern Christmas (e.g. Santa, presents, and that historical dude having a birthday) it goes into the ‘anti’ lock-up. It’s just one of a load of great Christmas-critical tunes on their Just Not Quite … A Christmas Album (Vol. 2). Classic Pat strikes a different note of holiday misgiving with “I Got What I Wanted for Christmas.” Poor Pat. He’s got the girl, it’s Christmas morning, only he’s having second thoughts about the whole ‘I love you’ thing. Definitely awkward. Power pop workaholics The Photocopies aren’t taking a break this season but don’t be fooled by their seasonally-titled Cheer Up, It’s Christmas EP. More like Merry F-ing Xmas. In one song the protagonist takes 37 seconds to confront and dump a cheating partner while in another they ooze desperate holiday insecurity about being alone on Christmas day. But the music is pretty peppy. “Christmas Alone” vibes a bit of “Crimson and Clover” in the very best way. Being down never sounded so good.

NYC’s Make Like Monkees are holiday mad. Just try counting up all the Christmas tunes on their multiple Bandcamp pages. Seemingly no aspect of the holiday scene goes unsung about, good or bad. “Christmas Hit-n-Run” is particularly lyrically brutal, with lines like ‘you’re the worst the gift I have got’ and ‘you’re everything a good gift’s not’. Ouch! But more from MLM later on. Mike Weatherford’s ramshackle ode “All I Want For Christmas is You (To Leave Me Alone)” is loaded with anti-Christmas sentiment but what makes it special is its comic timing. Again and again he turns what sounds like his initial lyrical meaning upside down. Ah, the burn. The Happy Somethings are anything but this season with three different versions of their self-described ‘jolly miserabilist festive ditty’ “It’s Christmas Time (We’re Miserable as Sin).” We’re featuring the ‘bah humbug’ version, naturally. And then Edward O’Connell captures a yuletide spirit I can really relate to with “MFC.” That stands for ‘merry effing xmas,’ pardon my French. Growing up, rarely did the season pass in my house without that expletive phrase putting in an appearance.

Our next three Christmas critics have all got a love/hate thing going on about the holidays which they regularly set to music. Christmas Aguilera put a new seasonal single out every year to raise money to end homelessness and poor housing. “This Sky” draws attention to how many people face a stark reality of rising bills and housing uncertainty, even as others throw back another rum and eggnog. Another holiday song machine is Rotterdam’s The Non-Traditionals. With pop culture-riffing album titles like Ok Christmas and All the Jingle Ladies they’re not a serious lot. Or aren’t they? Their ambitious proposal to gather up every “Plastic Tree” and burn them is either an inspired bit of political and environmental direct action or a recipe for very poor air quality. Leaning into the organ Make Like Monkees return now to pretty much kill the Christmas spirit with their revelation that “Santa Claus is Dead.” Hard to recover any festive bonhomie after that.

We wrap up this hate-the-holidays telethon where we began – with Hans. Can anybody really match his contempt for Christmas? Instead of giving the guy is focused on taking: the money, whatever Christmas Eve good feeling they were cooking up at the Nakatomi tower, and more than a few lives along the way. Luckily we have a song that perfectly captures all this and more from Athens, Georgia sparse-folkie Four Eyes. “Everything Will Change This Christmas: The Ballad of Hans Gruber” is a brilliant Freedom Fry-like rumination on the true meaning of Gruber, how he brings a special ennui and FU to holiday time. Really, Christmas isn’t complete without him.

You’re welcome, all you merry misanthropes. Turns out there is a crapping-all-over-Christmas playlist designed especially for you. Even if your heart really is two sizes too small, you needn’t just grind your teeth in silence anymore. Now you can sing out ‘bah humbug’ for all to hear!

Holiday hit parade

17 Thursday Dec 2020

Posted by Dennis Pilon in Poprock Themepark

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Brothers Steve, Dolour, Greg Pope, Holiday songs, Lisa Mychols, Lisa Mychols & Super 8, Los Straightjackets, Nick Lowe, Nick Piunti and the Complicated Men, Peggy Sue, Ralphie's Red Ryders, Ruen Brothers, The Jac, Trolley, Velcro Mary, Vista Blue

Under normal circumstances we’d be reeling from the nearly toxic levels of holiday music saturation going on. Every shop, office or mall would be wall-to-wall Santa tunes, with a few mentions of that Jesus guy for good measure. And here I’d come along making the case for even more eggnog-splattered tune-age but with a significantly higher quotient of hooks. But not this year. Lockdown has put the holiday music hostage-taking on hold, at least somewhat. So I expect even greater tidings of joy to accompany my annual holiday hit parade offerings! Forget tinsel, let’s get a little reverb on that tree.

Kicking off our seasonal singles is fab contribution from Lisa Mychols. Last year Williamsport Grade 8 math teacher and aspiring songwriter Brian Fagnano wrote me late in the season to alert me to this great tune he’d written and convinced Mychols to record (sometimes cold-calling actually works!) and the result, “Ringing Bells on Christmas Day,” is fantastic, an instant classic! His note came too late to include the song in last year’s holiday post but I’ve kept it aside to feature this year. The track has a great Spector-ish quality to it, particularly in the song structure, with an updated, chiming indie-charm production-wise. This one’s going into an eggnog-with-rum level of rotation.

Another last-year Christmas song contribution came from the uber talented Brothers Steve. In addition to releasing a highly celebrated debut album (#1, reviewed here) the boys managed to get out a double-A-sided seasonal single. Last year’s post had one of the songs and this year I’m featuring the other, “I Love the Christmastime.” It’s got an early period Squeeze-like appeal, so 1980, in the best sort of way. The song also appears on the Big Stir Singles: The Yultide Wave with a load of other great tunes and artists (check out the whole package here). Another reliable band of hooky holiday music providers is Vista Blue with a whole album of festive tunes and one-off singles. But this year they blew the doors off on the doing-the-holiday-music thing with their Ralphie’s Red Ryders project and its accompanying album You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out. What a wonderful tribute to everyone’s fave anxiety-fueled holiday movie classic, A Christmas Story. And the songs are great too! I included “I’m Gonna Get an A+ on My Theme” because it’s my fave at this particular moment – that could (will) change. Growing up Roy Orbison’s “Pretty Paper” was a holiday 45 must play. Roy’s gone but a bit of him lives on in a raft of current releases from the Ruen Brothers, like their brand new holiday song, “This Wholesome Christmas Eve.” The boys nail the guitar ambience and songwriting style of 1962 while the vocals really are heavenly.

Ruen Brothers – This Wholesome Christmas Eve

The holidays offer performers an immense catalogue of now-classic material to cover in their bid to get a piece of that seasonal download/streaming action. But not all remakes are made equally. Nick Lowe is ‘old reliable’ in his ability to cover a tune and practically reinvent it. His collection of seasonal songs, Quality Street, as aptly named, and not in the cheap chocolates sort of way. This year he dropped two more holiday songs on us, one a cover of “Let It Snow.” With the able backing of his regulars Los Straightjackets, Nick largely lets the song’s hooky melody do all the work and the result are candy cane good. Indie darlings Peggy Sue strike a similar guitar pose with their cover of the venerable “White Christmas,” with just a shiver of their distinctive other-worldly Blue Velvet-style on the vocals. Power pop master Greg Pope gets right to work cranking the guitar all over “It Came Upon a Midnight Clear,” shifting from reverby lead to power chords with solid melodic effect. A less obvious pairing sees melodic noise-ster Velco Mary add some swing to the otherwise rather more typically morose “Silent Night.” But, hey, it works, giving the song some as-yet undiscovered pep.

Velcro Mary – Silent Night

Ok, back to new holiday songs. Dolour has definitely been good this year, releasing copious amounts of great material, both albums and singles. No coal for these guys. But they have more to give! Like “All Winter Long,” a contribution to the season with a nice McCartney “Wonderful Christmastime” ambience. Nick Piunti and the Complicated Men’s “Christmas Morning” is a more upbeat take on festive music, with both their signature jangle and Bryan Adams-meets-Elvis Costello vocals in attendance. Now here’s a timely seasonal tune, in more ways than one: The Jac (featuring the Christmas crew)’s “I Won’t Be Leaving Home for Christmas.” I mean, no metaphor here. We’re locked down or should be, for everyone’s sakes. Still, Jangle band and The Jac main man Joe Algeri manages to make it sound light and uplifting, with a sing-along feel and great harmonies. Now slipping back a few years, here’s a winning Christmas selection from Trolley’s Star of Wonder album, “Christmas in the Marketplace.” The guitar riffing alone here makes this song sparkle.

We wrap up this installment of our holiday hit parade by coming full circle, back to Lisa Mychols, this time working with Super 8. The duo wowed listeners with the obvious musical chemistry all over their self-titled debut effort this past summer, one that managed to effectively vibe sun, sand and a bit of surf. Now they take aim at winter with “Red Bird,” and the track is more proof that what they’ve got going is no fluke. The song is easy-going and breezy like an afternoon skate on an outdoor rink.

Merry happy to you this season dear readers, wherever you are and whatever you believe. I hope your holidays are filled with hooks that get cranked to 11.

Photo credit: Larry Gordon.

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